Twisted Logic

Ah, i remember it as if it were yesterday. Hokay, so, I was like, walking down the road to the pub, right? Wait, or was it the shops? Anyways, I was on my way to the Library, when suddenly, a hideous stranger holding a balloon with the lolfaic on it and riding a pink scooter burst epically from the window of the bus depo, followed by a massive fireball and shouting "PICKLED GHERKINS ATE MAH BAYBEEEEZ!!!!!" at the top of his lungs. or her lungs. I couldn't really tell. "it" then weeled it's scooter over to me and cheerfully asked if i had found Satan. When I replied, "of course, he's right over there", the thing proceeded to eat itself to death out of fear. I was left standing outside the Bunnings wth a pink scooter and several blue kittens, which then started "moo"-ing uncontrollably. I decided that IT'S A TRAP and began upon the only logical case of action. I made the secret signal with my hands and became the RaveParty Power Ranger, turning day into night and starting an epic rave party in the street. I awoke at 11 o'clock the next day lying in a hospital bed with a MASSIVE FUCKING CANNON(!) grafted to my chest.

True story. Oh, and I am single :/

request wisdom here

when i first heard of shark weak i thought no. impossible. no such thing. shark strong

atumn:

pizzaforpresident:

atumn:

Haha u English and Canadian people have school tomorrow kiss my ass lmao

tomorrow’s labour day, canada doesn’t have school you dumb american

no it’s an amurican holiday u dumb canadian

laboUr day lmao pwn

(Source: e102gamma)

183 notes

h-i-g-h-5-w-h-o-r-e:

darth-rager:

my life goal is to reblog this every monday

^i’ve reblogged this every monday for 3 weeks in a row >:}

i’m on my way to success

(Source: becausejensenackles)

971,383 notes

trollingchannel:

http://trollingchannel.tumblr.com/

(Source: chanzero)

43,250 notes

Hey fellas, you gotta act like you’ve been around girls before… you’re acting like a bunch of, you know, drunk frat boys. You gotta chill out, alright, (points to group of boys) ‘cause you’re fucking this up for me. Understand what I’m saying? I don’t want to play anymore because you’re fuckin’ around. So chill out, alright? Alright? You’re cool? Stay in your own little area alright don’t fuck around, seriously. They’ll just take you out, we’ll give you your money back and you get the fuck out of here, alright? I’m serious. We’re gonna skip that song and you can thank these guys because I don’t wanna play it again, ok? I’m serious… DON’T FUCK AROUND. Blame these guys right here, chill the fuck out, don’t push girls. I saw what you did there- I saw what you did there to the girl in front of you. DON’T FUCK AROUND.

Dan Auerbach addressing a group of guys pushing around some girls at a Black Keys concert (via the-vibe-is-infinite)

(Source: allbrookling)

481 notes